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Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Your girl.

Music: Kanye West - Heartless.

Hate the feeling I always get whenever I walk away from you,

the type of feeling that makes me want to turn around and run straight back into your arms,

the type of feeling that makes me regret turning my back to you,

the type of feeling that always makes me wish I could take every single thing I ever said back.

Yet the best part is that I can never undo what I just did.

It sucks how I know that I'm in the wrong, even though I'm in the process of hurting you, and I just can't stop the feelings from flowing, nor the words from spilling.

I hate to know that whatever I just said will impact you in a way which is far greater than it impacted me, that you'll recoil from whatever unnecessary shxt I just dished out for you on a diamond platter.

Yet why did you let my hand go?

Why did you just allow the silence to engulf the both of us, as the distance in between grew bigger and bigger?

In my 16 years of living, I've never met another like you, some one who's so obviously lying, yet I forced myself to believe in every single deceit you chose to let slip.

Some one whom I've sacrificed hour after hour of sleep to complete one project after another for.

Some one whom I just know that I'll never forgive myself for ever letting go, which leads me to make some of the biggest mistakes of my life.

Yet, I try to tell myself time and time again how a leopard IS able to change its' spots, if it bothers to try hard enough, and want to change badly enough.

Tell me, have I trusted the wrong person after all this time?

Baby, you're the one whom my life revolves around right now, sounds cheesy, yet it is true in some ways.

Just now, when I threw a bitch fit, let go of your hand, turned my back against you and walked away, why didn't you try to stop me?

As usual, it's my fault, I know it but I can't help it. My temper's not exactly one of my assets, no, it isn't one of them at all.

Yet all throughout, you've been giving in, putting up with all my unreasonable demands, and even some times, going along with my ridiculous schemes, mostly without uttering a single word of resentment.

Yet, after all's said and done, I know I'll never ever want to lose some one like you.

Despite all the mistakes you've made, I don't want to let what we have go. Some people search for what we've got for a whole life time and never manage to find what they're looking for.

We've found ours.

Moreover, you're only human, and I've made my own mistakes. It's how we learn.

18/11 will forever stay in my heart, and I'll wait for you to forgive me for the mistakes I've made, be it months ago, or just an hour ago.

You're always be my sunshine, hunneh, always.
And no matter where life brings us, I'll always rather be in your arms then be in some one else's.

I'll rather brave thunder storms with you then sail through the calm seas with some one else, always remember that.

If there's only one thing left for you to count on, it'll be my love for you, you can bet on me, baby.

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